Guys and dating games

21-Nov-2017 13:33

Relationships thrive on vulnerability and being able to let your guard down.

Playing games and “winning” a relationship should never be a game.

Once you start playing games with a guy, where does it end? Any player can change them, and anyone can quit whenever they want. It involves two people who change and whose feelings change on a daily and even possibly an hourly basis.

It can be difficult and frustrating to try to keep up with who’s playing what game at what time and your partner could at some point throw in the towel on your relationship or what would’ve been your relationship. As much as you want to try to play games with a guy to try to minimize any potential risk your heart is taking, you can’t.

One of the main reasons why men play mind games is because they feel the need to stroke their own ego.

They need to feel that they are wanted and adored and so will get what they want by playing mind games with women. Sometimes men can feel that they have no control over some things in their life and so might turn to playing mind games with women to fill this gap.

Having some sort of guide may seem comforting, but in fact it’s counter-productive. The only thing dating has in common with a game are the elements of risk and chance.

In order to have a healthy, successful, adult relationship, you have to stop playing games.

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Come on, we’ve all heard Oprah: a relationship can’t survive if you aren’t being your authentic self, and what’s less authentic than being underhanded? When you stop playing games, the attraction might not be there. Whenever you’re presenting a false sense of self, you run the greater risk of your relationship not working when you finally let the guard down and are yourself. The thing about games – especially when they don’t come with a pair of dice, board, and instruction book – is that the rules can change at any given time.If you knew that you were going to have a massive fight but the world’s best makeup sex two weeks from tomorrow, life would be pretty boring, right?As much as it’s uncomfortable to live in the moment and be vulnerable and put yourself out there, you can’t be in a real relationship if you don’t.If your goal is always to win, you will always lose.

If you’re biggest concern is always having the upper hand, you most likely aren’t in the headspace or at a maturity level to be in a real relationship.When you do this, you’re ignoring your intuition for the sake of some rule you think you’re supposed to follow about how long it should be before you text a guy back or whatever the case may be.

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